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EQI Forum

A couple of years ago two volunteers created a forum to go with the EQI site. Since then the main admin of it has stopped being the admim, so I have taken over that responsibility. At times the forum is a bit of a burden to me for various reasons, so I have decided to try to limit the access a bit.

My goal is to reduce the number of people on the forum to only those who spend a lot of time reading eqi.org and who really understand how different out ideas and beliefs are, and then who want to support us in the direction we are going.

Here is a checklist of what I would consider "a lot of reading" or at least a pretty good start...

And here is a list of more specific "criteria" for the kind of people we would most like to have using the forum.

We don't expect many people to meet all of these criteria. We are aware that there are very, very few people who share our vision as well as all of these beliefs and skills/abilities, but we have decided we would rather have just 3 people on the forum than have 300 or 3,000 who don't really get and support what we are trying to do.

Right now we really need people to help and value us, but we are spending a lot of time with people won't do much of either one - so we need to make some changes.

We are also thinking of making some more focussed forums instead of maintaining the general one we have had till now. For example, we might make one about invalidation stories or about a small membership based online support group for adults who are trying to recover from emotional abuse by parents or partners.

So given all that, if you would like to be part of the forum

Steve and P.
Jan 2011

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Check List

If you feel ok with the list of "criteria" above, but you haven't read much of the site yet, here is a check list of some of the more important things we would like you to have read/understood and feel ok with our beliefs about...

should, inappropriate, selfish

unmet emotional needs | rights and needs

importance of emotions

respect

invalidation

 

Ideal list - ie kind of people we most want using the forum

(Some of these are duplicates of the checklist above..)

People who...

- are neither religious nor "spiritual" and don't believe in any gods or life before or after death etc - or at least do not bring those beliefs into the forum posts.

- do not support the use of mood altering, mind controlling drugs on teenagers

- see the cause and effect relationship between abuse by parents and depression, self harm suicidal feelings in teens.

- understand what invalidation is

- do not support forced (compulsory) education

- are emotionally literate... or working towards it

- do not support laws based on age discrimination - ie restricting the freedom of those under 18 just because of their age

- do not believe in using punishment

- who want to help others

- who value our work and really show that they do in some way or other

 
Valuing our Work

We at EQI give away a lot of our time. Steve in particular has been helping people at no charge whatsoever for over 15 years. His partner has been helping him and others who visit her website for over two years, also at no charge most of the time. Obviously this is not financially sustainable since we don't have other jobs. Previously we ran a backpackers hostel in Europe but we left that in 2009 and now this is our full time work.

While we can't possibly continue to do so much for free, we also realize people can make valuable and much needed/appreciated contributions in non-financial ways. Thus, those of you who want to use the forum but can't make any financial contribution to our work can help us out in some other way. Just let us know if you are interested and we will work with you so we each benefit and feel satisfied.

If all goes well, once we get enough help, we will be able to open the forum up again.