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|shes understandably put off by Celias
|In first 110 pages...
he never suggest parents
10 times in first 110 pages he talks about the
parents' good intentions. He never says the teens have
good intentions in anything they do.
0 - emotional support
0 - listening skils
0 - listener, listeners
|4. Think about your typical
responses to your teens emotional distress. Do you
unwittingly make things worse?
|He does seem to understand that teens self-harm when
they are in intense emotional pain.
He doesn't suggest
their environments might be more painful.
- Explain judging, punishing, threatening,
He could have a list of expressions and words not to
use. And explain why.
- Explain that their homes are more emotionally
painful. Less emotionally supportive.
In my experience, invalidation
generally stems from parents
reasonable and good intentions for their children. The
validation and invalidation might sound condemning or
please understand that I am in no way blaming you or
youre responsible for your childrens
troubles. After 30-plus years
of working with children and parents, I have seen that
overwhelming majority of parents only want to be helpful
only goal is to help you understand what might account
for your best
parenting efforts falling short. There are different
validation and invalidation. Kids who are emotionally
probably more sensitive to even the mildest incidents of
invalidation. So what may be no big deal for one child
experienced as a very big deal for another. Hold
onit gets even more
complicated: what may be experienced as mildly
invalidating on one
occasion could be felt as really invalidating on another
if the child
is emotionally charged up. Short of being candidates for
how can you validate in the midst of your own worry and