Emotional Intelligence | Stevehein.com


June 8


Was thinking and then Louis walked by and started talking to someone right outside my door.

Lost almost all of my thoughts.

Clenched my fists and shook my hands and arms. A little like an ape.

Was thinking about Josh, Yalena, all the things that hurt… Mariana. Sent her another text last night.

How will you feel the next time a teenager kills themselves in Salta?

Forecasting feelings.

I know it will hurt me so much. I feel responsible. I am because I am able to respond, not just respond but prevent.

Almost no one seems to care here.

Caring, crying, hugs, psychologists.

I have asked a lot of people if they think their psychologist or therapist would cry if they killed themselves and they have all said no.

I wonder if Josh cries. If he ever cried over a student’s suicide, or emotional pain.

I wonder if David or Jack cry. Or Peter. And when and what they do when they are crying.

Or what they think someone else should do.

Psychologists don’t like me because I make things too simple. I don’t use all the big words they do. I give teenagers and children hugs. This scares them. They feel threatened because they know instinctively that this is what we need and what the world lacks, but their training tells them it is unprofessional to give hugs.

They are trained by people who are afraid to give hugs. Uncomfortable with touch.

Probably they are uncomfortable because they are afraid they won’t be able to a) control themselves or b) control their “client”

Have not heard back from Josh, Geetu, or Rita the lawyer.

A lot of things bother me…

Right now. Everything about EI, Josh, MHS, Jack, David, Peter etc.

Trying to pay my taxes…